its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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