I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
