in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Dear god my vagina.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I did not marry a roomba.
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