College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
