i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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