Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
