Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
