If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Randomize