remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
