Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
She needs sedatives and a leash
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
