would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
