Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
