Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
