I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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