Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
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