I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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