Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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