So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
they're like a gay fantastic four
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
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