Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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