the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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