hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
drinking out of a sandbucket again
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
