thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
