Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Randomize
