You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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