dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize
