your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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