did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Michael Bay diarrhea
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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