respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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