I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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