I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
