What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
