Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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