Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize