Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
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