i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
