After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
