Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
