"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize
