he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
