your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
