I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Randomize
