oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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