Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
