Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
