Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
