talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Can I color on your dick again?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Randomize