Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
