it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize