ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
he was CRYING into my vagina
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Randomize
