Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
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